its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
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