Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
