so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Is Oprah even human
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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