i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
