The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
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