Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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