Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
operation harelip BJ is a go
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
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