At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
This show inspires me to have sex in space
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
