yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
