I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Randomize
