She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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