where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Randomize