Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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