yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
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