Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
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I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
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I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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