but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
it's like heaven, but drunker
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
