it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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