some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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