im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
time to smoke my breakfast
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
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