He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Drake has all the answers
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
