Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
i've created a new STD.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
