There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize