I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Randomize
