He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
