hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Randomize
