also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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