I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
These Attractive Criminals Got Modeling Contracts After Getting Arrested
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
This Girlâ€™s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.