I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
