White coat. Heels.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Rumble strips road head = magical
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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