My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
My apartment stinks of burning failure
The ass gains better be worth it
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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