is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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