You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Randomize
