I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
this beer tastes like vomit already
the day after is always just damage control
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Randomize
