so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
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