Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
4 words: hood of his car
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
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