I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
