I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
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