I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Holy shit dude........stairs
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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