i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Randomize