The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
