i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
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