TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
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