i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
my god I love twenty year old dicks
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Randomize
