I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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