Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
