You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.