But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool