what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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