and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize