I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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