S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize